Spring

Spring is here and honestly, I love it.

Recently, I have been holding onto a lot from the past. It's like I've been standing on this cliff balancing on the edge of the past and the future. For a while, I really wanted to jump into the future and fly yet I was still clinging to the past. Right now though, I feel so ready to soar into what life has in store next. I don't really know where this feeling came from as it appeared so suddenly. I was walking to class yesterday and I felt this gentle breeze and the warmth from the sun and was inspired. I don't really know. Spring came so suddenly and I honestly love it. The weather is beautiful and the air smells so clean and fresh. It makes me want to go outside and live life. I sound like a Hakunamatata-Hipster but I'm really digging it. As the seasons change and life begins to grow, I'm ready to end my emotional winter and live my life to the fullest.

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Phoenix Feathers

I wish I could be one of those cool people who doesn't care. You know, the cool kids. They post those caught-off-guard-but-not photos on Instagram with de-saturated filters. I'm not one of those people though and I never will be. I have a lot of old friends like that. They're friends who weren't really good friends and they lied to me a lot. Friends who betrayed my trust but I always forgave them. Now we don't talk and they are these cliché cool kids who think they own the world. I know I wont ever be "cool" like that, because it's not me. There is one thing though. These "Friends" knew me as one person. This person was scared and shy. They saw me as this awkward being that could not exist without them. Now, I want them to see me strong. I may not be cool, but I can be strong. I want them to see me as a person they never knew. Even though it's cliché, I want them to see me like a phoenix.

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To Write or Not To Write

I am stuck in a little problem where I really want to write but I'm too lazy. Seriously, I've had half of a chapter written for three weeks that I just haven't gotten to finishing. My level of procrastination is so intense that one day I waited to write an essay until the day before it was due then got an extension on the essay and then didn't write it until the night before the extension was due. It is a terrible cycle. I also have a problem where I don't really want to write for the book I should be writing. I want to start something new but I feel I should work on what I already started first. In the end I just waste time and watch YouTube.

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Bad Guy Goes Good

I always have had a thing for characters that have a rough past but are still good in the end. These characters always have the best development and are always really deep. It's characters like Zuko or Damon. They are a bad guy half the time and make a lot of mistakes but they always work really hard to fix them. I just find that characters like this are so easy to love. Maybe it's because they are more relatable than the cliché perfect characters. I mean, we as people always mess up and seeing these characters grow can be so inspiring.

One day, I want to write a story with a character like that in it. An epic character with an insane backstory that struggles with the fight between good and evil. They have a constant battle with their inner demons as they fight the physical monsters in the story. Throughout the novel you see the character grow until one day they do something totally insane no one could have predicted. The shocking turning point in the climax of the novel as all the pieces start falling into place.

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New Year

As of 13 days ago, we entered a new year. With a new year comes the opportunity to grown and look back on how far you've come. It's the chance to make changes and goals, a reminder that we are always movie forward despite everything else. Of course, these are all things that can be done at any time. A new year, however, works as a milestone that puts perspective on life. Me personally, I am very excited 2017 and all it has to offer. I want this to be the year that I put things together and make some positive changes in my life. I want to get healthy and write more, I want to become a better person and get more involved. That's what this blog is, a tool to help me grow. To write and express, even if no one even sees this. With the new year comes a world of opportunities and I plan on seizing every single one. My word for 2017 is strong, because that's what I want to be by the end.

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